Valentine's Day and ... Dostoyevsky?

It’s Valentine’s Day.

For those of us who won’t be posting cutesy couple selfies and love-drenched captions today, I’d like to suggest a much darker—and honestly way funnier—alternative: Notes from Underground by Fyodor Dostoevsky.

I’m kind of joking. But also, am I?

The Underground Man (the main character who never is assigned a name) is peak high-brow co…